10 Reasons One-on-One Meetings are Terrible

One-on-one meetings between managers and their direct reports are a crucial element of effective leadership and team development. Those meetings build strong connections and foster growth in teams. However, not all managers excel at conducting these sessions, and some direct reports might find the meetings less than helpful. 

Here's 10 reasons why some managers might struggle with their one-on-one meetings:

1. Lack of Preparation

   Have you ever had a manager who seemed like they were winging your one-on-one? Lack of preparation can lead to unstructured discussions and missed opportunities for meaningful conversations. Preparation involves reviewing employee performance, setting goals, and anticipating potential challenges.

   
   

   At RKE, we teach managers to use a consistent framework during one-on-ones. This creates an expected rhythm, and direct reports can prepare ahead of time to bring their wins, challenges, and needs to the conversation.

   
   

2. Communication Breakdown

   Clear communication is foundational to excellent management. Managers who struggle to articulate expectations, provide feedback, or actively listen may find their meetings unproductive and frustrating for both parties. 

   
   

3. Time Mismanagement

   Canceling or consistently rescheduling meetings can feel like a game of hide and seek. Direct reports need consistent meetings with their managers to ensure that they are working on the right priorities in the right way at the right time to contribute to business growth. The agenda for the one-on-one needs to fit in the allocated time for the meeting, too. Consistent meetings that use time well can build trust while meetings that feel rushed or undervalued can erode trust.

   
   

4. Neglecting Employee Development

   Some managers focus solely on task-oriented discussions during one-on-one meetings and neglect the development aspect. A lack of attention to an employee's professional growth can lead to dissatisfaction and disengagement, and that can mean losing a valued employee. Create space to explore their professional goals, and what you can do to help them achieve their goals.

   
   

5. Failure to Address Concerns

   Conflict-avoidant? Overly nice? These two dispositions can lead managers to avoid addressing concerns during one-on-one meetings. Few things are as toxic as unresolved issues that are given space to fester. Ultimately, performance is hindered when managers don’t tackle the tough stuff head-on. 

   
   

   We had a client who let a senior leader remain in their role for 18 months after they knew it was a bad fit. The discomfort of hard conversations prevented the CEO from drawing the line, so blame-shifting and ghosting turned into outright insubordination, subversive activity, and siloing. Hoping for a turnaround without calling for a turnaround is simply wishful thinking.

   
   

6. Inflexibility

   We endorse using an agenda for one-on-ones, and we also know that excellent managers can flex in the moment. Rigidly sticking to an agenda without considering direct reports' individual needs and preferences can result in less effective meetings. Flexibility allows for adaptability to changing circumstances as urgent personal or professional matters arise.

   
   

7. Overemphasis on Criticism

   Constant criticism without acknowledgment of achievements can demoralize employees. One of my leadership milestones came when a direct report humbly pointed out how demotivated the team was by my “keen eye for excellence.” Translation: my keen ability to point out every mistake and misstep. Managers need to find that crucial balance in creating a safe place to celebrate wins and correct errors. 

   
   

8. Ignoring Employee Input

   One-on-ones are a conversation, not a soliloquy. Our team advocates for the direct report to do most of the talking in that meeting. Managers who dominate the conversation and dismiss employee input miss out on valuable insights. Encouraging open dialogue and actively involving employees in decision-making can enhance the effectiveness of these meetings. 

   
   

9. Lack of Empathy

   Managers who fail to understand and empathize with their employees may struggle to build strong relationships. Empathy fosters a positive work environment and promotes trust and collaboration. That sense of safety invites everyone on the team to contribute their full discretionary effort.

   
   

10. Inconsistent Follow-Up

    Effective one-on-one meetings conclude with a review of next steps and follow-up actions. Managers who fail to follow through on commitments made during these sessions may lose the trust of their direct reports. Trust and loyalty is built when someone does what they say they will do.

One-on-one meetings don’t have to be so-so. They can be places of collaboration and feedback, creating a workplace where people feel heard, valued, and ready to shine! 

At RKE Partners, we help teams shine by leveling up managerial skills and creating team alignment to bolster business growth. Schedule a consultation to see how we can support your team.